The Best Drink for Morning Mass

by James Roland

A monk walks into a bar … which isn't unheard of in France. In fact, when France comes up with a recipe for good liquor, they build a palace to mass-produce the stuff and hire monks to make it.

This is the story of Benedictine, a sweet, honey-flavored liquor that pours thick, makes your lips tingle like a clove cigarette, and has a history that plays out like a Dan Brown novel. It was invented by a Venetian monk, named Dom Bernardo Vincelli, from the Abbey of Fécamp. The complex recipe, which included 27 different herbs and spices from around the world, was a roaring success and soon found favor in the King's court.

France was producing about 150,000 bottles per year when the country erupted in violent revolution. Production came to a halt when the recipe mysteriously disappeared amidst the confusion, leaving modern historians wondering if they have yet to trace the true origins of France's bloody past. For a state-side comparison, just imagine what would happen if a few thousand baseball fans got to Brewer's Stadium, only to find the Miller Lite taps had run dry. One can scarcely imagine the carnage and car alarms, the broken glass and gunshots, and the infamous words that would linger in the smoky air: Let them drink Bud?

The secret of Benedictine lay dormant for more than fifty years, until Alexandre Le Grand was browsing a distant relative's library and found the recipe jotted in an old manuscript. He deciphered the text and Benedictine re-entered the French blood stream. Within twenty years, Le Grand built an enormous palace to house the distillery and Benedictine is made there to this day. You can book tours through the Benedictine website and, even though the monks quit their day job back in the 18th century, it's fun to imagine cloaked figures stooping over enormous vats and stirring the delicious brew with long wood poles. Just the thought almost makes it worth a trip to France for a glorified brewery tour.

But if all you want is a free drink from someone with a plastic name-tag and a funny accent, why not try Milwaukee?

Drink Info:

Can Be Purchased: Beverages and More
Website: www.benedictine.fr/anglais/
Price: $32 (750 ml) $18 (375 ml)
RedFence Rating: 8 (out of 10)

posted April 11, 2006


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